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Let's get one thing straight: this is an a children's book for adults. If you decide to read this to your child, you're guaranteed to be asked, "what's a cockblock?" Your answer would have to be of course, "you" The book is inappropriate and absolutely hilarious.

Sure, your baby may be a little young to be growing facial hair, but that doesn't mean they can't be sporting a mustache while pacified. Girl or boy. Keep your baby both stylish and quiet at the same time with this mustache pacifier that will make dad or mom jealous.

If minimizing stretch marks is important to you, then you'll want to keep your skin soft and supple to increase its elasticity. One way of doing that is by using belly butter, which can keep the skin on your baby bump soft and moisturized. Made with 99% natural cocoa, shea and jojoba butter, this is is specially formulated for mothers-to-be and baby too.

Get ready for stares and glares from strangers when you crack open a tall cold bottle of milk (or formula) for your baby. This baby cerveza and beer bottle puts a twist to the term milk drunk. Remember to drink responsibly and don't drink and stroller.

If hugging the toilet is your new morning ritual, then ginger candy is the solution to your morning sickness relief. Ginger is often recommended by OBs for its anti-nausea effects, so having it available in candy form makes it easily accessible whenever and wherever.

Your baby's been a locavore before it was cool. Outfit your breastfeeding baby in this pro-boob onesie and proudly announce that this is one kid that subscribes to the idea of food that is produced locally, organically and with no artificial colors and flavors added.

Is there someone in your life that you really dislike? Do they have kids? Well do I have the gift for you. Irritate the parents to no end by arming the kids with their very own recorder, complete with sheet music from Disney's Frozen. They'll play it all day and never let it go. Revenge is indeed a dish best served frozen.

Who needs parents when you can strap a milk feeder to a crib? I mean, a baby is just like a giant hamster, right? Just kidding, it's just a gift box used to package a real present.

Yes, your baby could be shoving one of Sophie's long giraffe legs into their mouth like every other baby, or they could be gnawing on this delicious silicone chicken wing instead. Tough call. Your baby feels like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight.

Nothing says "I care" more than the perfect card for a special occasion. This is THAT card for a baby shower. Celebrate the joyous event with a message that doesn't beat around the bush (no pun intended).